So, you have kids and they don’t like what you cook. WHAT DO YOU DO? After joining the ranks as a mom nearly 11 years ago and having 3 1/2 children now, I know how important time around the dinner table can be. Every night, we gather to spend time together and want to enjoy each others’ company, not argue about what we’re actually eating. Depending on what is made (and what it looks like), there can be DRAMA. This mama doesn’t have time for that.
Since this is not our first rodeo and my husband and I have been around the block a few times with the different personalities of each of our children, we have come up with rules that have come to work really well for our family. No tears, just well laid out expectations that we live (and die) by.
Have something on the plate you know your kids will eat
Since I am a recipe developer and am always coming up with new recipes or foods they’ve never seen or tried before, they have a tendency to immediately say “I don’t like this” or “I don’t want to eat this” from the get go. But, if I have something they are familiar with or know they’ll eat, they are more likely to sit down and start eating with less complaining. These are simple foods I’m talking about, folks. A roll with butter. A taquito. A piece of garlic bread. Cucumbers or celery with ranch on the side. Apples and peanut butter. Not rocket science, but something small to get them eating first and complaining less.
Have set rules that are the same rules for everyone.
The golden rule at our house is you have to eat the number of bites according to your age. My son is 6, so he has to eat *at least* 6 bites of the food he doesn’t like before he can leave the table. Same rule applies to my 10 year old daughter and 3 year old son. (Our time outs work the same way. If sister is going to be sassy, she gets a 10-minute time out in the corner.)
I will say things can get tricky because my daughter hates rice, my son hates potatoes and my youngest is hesitant to eat any kind of pasta (besides macaroni and cheese), so if I’m serving those items I serve them separately from the main dish so its easy for my kids to eat what they like and then quickly take the bites of the things they don’t like. Example: if I’m serving stew with mashed potatoes, I’ll leave the mashed potatoes on one side of the plate and the stew on the other so the stew is easy to eat and my little one can easily eat his stew potato-free and take his small bites of potatoes and be done with dinner quicker. Less arguing when the food isn’t touching.
Don’t cave. Rules are rules.
If children know they can talk their way out of eating dinner, believe you me, they will do it every.single.time. So, it’s important to stick to your guns. But at the same time, don’t be a jerk about it either. Just kindly state the rule and say “I’m so sorry you’re having a hard time eating your mashed potatoes. Maybe after you get your bites in, we can come up with something you would want to eat for dinner tomorrow.” You want to keep it as positive an experience as possible. You getting angry or frustrated with your child is a reaction to their response, not an appropriate action to help them understand and get through it.
Include your kids in the planning and cooking process
Having your kids look through food magazines, cookbooks at the library or even on Pinterest can be so beneficial and give you insight to what your kids likes and dislikes are. Have them pick a few dinners they’d be willing to try and then make them! Get them excited about it and make a big deal if they actually give it a try. Have low expectations, but definitely give the praise when they tried something new.
When I’m doing my weekly meal planning, I ask my kids what they want to eat and always get the usual “tacos” and “pizza” responses. So, we have taco tuesdays and pizza fridays. I’m not against these at all, but I do try to balance the meal out with extra fruit or veggies. Like, with our pizza nights, after our kids eat one slice, they would be required to eat x amount of veggies (according to their age) before they get another slice.
If they don’t like it, try try again.
At my dinner table, there’s always one kid who refuses to eat because they “don’t like it”. That doesn’t mean I’m never making that meal again. That means in a few more weeks, I WILL be making it again, maybe with a few tweaks. Try to figure out what they didn’t like about the meal and see if you could change it. For example, my son hates mashed potatoes, but just recently he tried roasted potatoes and really liked them! So it turns out he doesn’t hate ALL potatoes, he just doesn’t like the texture of mashed potatoes. So that’s such an easy fix for me! I’ll still make mashed potatoes here and there, but if I can roast them to keep my son happy, then that’s what I’ll do.
Something to also keep in mind (and remind your children of frequently) is taste buds are changing constantly. Just because they didn’t like mashed potatoes last month doesn’t mean they still don’t like mashed potatoes.
Be in it for the long haul
We have been following these rules for eons (since we only had one child) and they have worked really well for us! I am constantly trying new recipes and introducing new fruits or veggies to our family and only recently have we seen the fruits of our labors.
A few days ago, I roasted brussels sprouts and all my kids ate them without complaining. My husband and I were in shock and didn’t want to mention it to the kids at dinner, but after the fact we told them how impressed we were! This has been at least 8 years in the making because both Gordon and I LOVE brussels sprouts and our kids hate them. I never stopped making them this whole time because brussels sprouts are delicious and I love love love them, but it took 8+ years of complaining for my kids to embrace them. Maybe embrace is the wrong word, but you get the idea.
Also just this past week, I brought my boys grocery shopping with me and let them choose different fruits and veggies they’d like to eat. A shopper commented at how knowledgeable my 3 year old seemed, requesting green grapes, pineapple, kiwi, apples, celery, cucumber, strawberries and eggplant! Bringing kids along really can make a difference, even if you’re not actively teaching them. I’m really not an eggplant lover, but my 6 year old really wanted to try it because it looked “funny and purple” so we have an eggplant on our counter that I’m still trying to figure out how to cook so he likes it.
Those are the basic, bare bones rules that we follow at our house!
What is your biggest struggle feeding your family? Leave a comment or question below and I’ll do my best to answer it 🙂
Have a great day, friends!